KICK A #!% MOVIE ALERT!- THE MONSTER

THE MONSTER
A24
2016 Color
91 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
Zoe Kazan, Ella Ballentine and Scott Speedman star.
Written and Directed by Bryan Bertino
Rated R for language, violence and gore.

This movie is powerful. I was a huge fan of  Bryan Bertino's The Strangers. I found his execution inspired. His slow burn technique produced some of the most horrific moments in genre history. And than a few years later he reemerged with Mockingbird. A huge piece of cinematic dreck. But he has redeemed himself with his brilliant new film. A hopeful representation of what's to come from this very talented film maker. Now I may be overhyping it a little. Although I was really impressed with the trailer I had modified expectations going in even though there was lots of solid buzz (the film currently sits at 80% positive on rotten tomatoes) and I was overly impressed.

The film centers on a troubled young mother and her daughter and their toxic relationship. In real time she is driving the young girl to her fathers where she will live because the mother struggles with alcoholism amongst many other immature traits. Along the elongated trip due to constant cigarette breaks so the mother can stretch out the proceedings. There is a big storm and they end up seemingly crashing into a wolf. But upon further inspection they discover it looks to have been mauled by some kind of wild animal. They of course call for help which is unsuccessful when the man is brutally attacked by a large unidentifiable creature. Terrified they are stuck in the car and need to find a way to get help so they can survive.

Although the film is suspenseful, it's not too scary. When the creature finally comes into view it leaves something to be desired. What makes the film work so well is the drama surprisingly enough. And there is some really strong stuff here. With each flashback of their painful relationship the proceedings become more and more immersive as you care about these very well drawn characters.

The movie is darkly lit throughout and Bertino smartly keeps the creature in it for most of the films run time. As the film progresses towards it's aggressive and heartfelt finale the scares, suspense and emotion are amped up leaving viewers stunned with a new insight on how the movie works on many levels. The performances from Zoe Kazan and Ella Ballantine as the mother and daughter are award worthy. There are some scenes that are so hard to watch and it's just unbelievable that they would exist in a genre film. The film's cinematography is appropriately dark but has some truly inspired touches throughout such as the gorgeous bathroom scene and that last shot. The screenplay and direction from Bertino are brilliant even though the horror aspect doesn't work as well as the dramatic side of things. Still make no mistake this is a horror film and you should expect nothing less. In the end The Monster is a film that really deserved a wide, theatrical release. It's a solid, unique horror experience that deserves to be widely seen and all the people associated with it deserve the attention and acclaim they would have gotten if it wasn't dumped to a direct TV, VOD release. So let's try and remedy that by getting the word out. ****.75/5

NEW BLOOD MUST SEE!: 47 METERS DOWN "BEST KILLER SHARK MOVIE SINCE JAWS!"

47 METERS DOWN

Dimension
2016 Color
87 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
Mandy Moore, Matthew Modine, and Clare Holt star.
Written and Directed by Johannes Roberts
N/R contains strong language, violence and gore.

47 Meters down which was also known as In the Deep last year is without a doubt the best killer shark movie since Jaws. Now I know that's a big statement and trust me I'm an underwater horror movie kinda guy. And to be honest I do tend to enjoy most of them from Deep Blue Sea to the unintentionally funny Shark Night and the camptastic Sharknado movies. I even liked the Shallows though I found it to be a bit lackluster. However, this film friggin delivers.

 And the wait is finally over on June 16th and trust me this is one you don't want to miss. The movie centers on two sisters, Lisa and Kate who are on a trip in Mexico. Lisa is just coming out of a relationship and has decided to try and make herself more interesting by partying it up in paradise. Lisa whose a bit more adventurous steers them towards two spunky Latin hunks who suggest they go great white shark diving of which they agree. Once on the boat Lisa starts to regret her decision but is pressured by Kate to "make herself more interesting". She of course agrees and that's when the nightmare begins.

Because as soon as they are plunged into the icy water filled with gliding monsters the chain to their cage breaks and they plummet 47 meters down into the dark depths of the ocean. With their air decreasing and surrounded by the sharks they must try and survive before it's too late. There's absolutely so much to love about this movie. Johannes Roberts of the recent, under rated The Other Side of the Door scores big time this go around. The movie is packed with a sweaty palm inducing, seat clenching, dread inducing atmosphere throughout.

 He expertly moves through the film ratcheting up the tension and development where it really counts. Kate played by Clare Holt is likable and Lisa portrayed by a very solid Mandy Moore is so believable turning in some of the best work of her career. The sharks are smartly kept in the dark but when they do emerge there more striking than any seen in quite some time. Beautifully filmed with haunting cinematography and a anxiety elevating enhancing score 47 Meters Down stands as a modern classic.

 Originally it was to be dumped to VOD last year but after some critical reactions a company picked up the film and now we are all in for a treat. It's definitely the kind of film worth the money on the big screen. Packed to the brim with horrific visuals and edge of your seat suspense I can only imagine how seeing this film with a packed audience will be! So rush out and see it, it's way better than last summer's sleeper hit The Shallows! This is the one we've been waiting for! ****.75/5

RETRO REVIEW: THE GUARDIAN

THE GUARDIAN
Universal 1990 Color
92 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
Jenny Seagrove, Dwier Brown, Cary Lowell, Brad Hall and Miguel Ferrer star.
Written by Stephen Volk
Directed by William Friedkin
Rated R for strong language, violence, gore, sexuality and nudity.

I remember my Dad taking me to see this film in theaters when I was 11 and of course I loved it automatically. I just happened to revisit it recently and wanted to share my thoughts. This movie rocks!. Yeah there are some cheesy parts sprinkled through out and the concept is way out there but that crazy execution is bat shit and  this is a welcome, wholly original spin on the tired cinematic killer Nanny trope.

 The film centers on a yuppie couple who hire a new woman who just happens to be a druid "sorceress" of sorts who worships a giant creepy tree in the forest that eats babies... Yes that's what it's about. The film is packed with gory, hella crazy death set pieces and remains oddly immersive throughout as it races towards it's insanely bloody climax. Now some of you will be put off by the strangeness of it all, but try and have an open mind because it's definitely worth the watch.

 Besides there have been way stranger movies but most of them don't meld together as well. William Friedkin of Exorcist fame directs the proceedings with a confident zest experimenting with audience expectations and trying some truly unique things. Not all of it is successful, some of the FX don't hold up and there are some questionable choices but the film is gorgeously shot with a trancey score adding to it's dark panache.

 So if you're in the mood for something different, something scary and something way out there that delivers the gory goods look no further than 1990's severely under rated horror gem the Guardian. Sure to make you think twice before thinking about hired help. ****.5/5

5 MOVIES FOR HALLOWEEN

INTRO:

It's that time of year again! Halloween or as most of us know it, the time too watch as many horror movies as possible. Well we've reached the day and it's October 31st. Below are some sweaty palm inducing goodies you may have missed to help you celebrate so you have a bloody good holiday!

RETRO HORROR: HOUSE OF THE DEVIL

2009 Horror/Thriller 95 Mins. Jocelin Donahue, Tom Noonan Mary Woronov, Greta Gerwig and AJ Bowen star. Written and Directed by Ti West Rated R for graphic violence, gore and language

Ti West's brilliant dread inducing cinematic nightmare may have been made in 2009 but it feels like something straight out of the 70's/early 80's. The film centers on a young woman named Samantha in the 80's. She finds herself in a situation where she is desperate for money, needing it for a deposit on a new apartment. So she accepts a babysitting job at a house in the middle of nowhere. Upon arriving she discovers that there is no baby/child and instead they need her too care for the spooky woman's ailing mother. Who according to them needs very little assistance, so she doesn't need to go upstairs and check on her. They offer her more money and she stays. As the night progresses she begins to hear noses, see shadows and strange figures until finally a dark secret is revealed. The film is a slow burn without a doubt. West soaks the film in a palpable tension of mounting anxiety before exploding at it's blood soaked finale. Innovatively borrowing from films of the era "Devil's" disturbing end will stay with you long after the credits roll.

REAL FEAR: HOUSES THAT OCTOBER BUILT 

2014 Horror/Thriller 91 Mins. Brandy Schaefer, Zack Andrews, Bobby Roe, Mikey Roe  and Jeff Larson star. Written by Zack Andrews Directed by Bobby Roe Rated R for language, violence, sexuality, nudity and drug use

However, if you find yourself in the mood for something that feels very real look no further than this nightmarish horror delight. "Houses" is a film that centers on a group of documentary film makers who embark on a road trip to find the most extreme haunts in America. Bobby Roe smartly adapts a genuine atmosphere creating characters that feel real and are likable. As the film progresses and they move from haunt to haunt disturbing truths come to light such as interviews with real people and disturbing news reports edited in to increase the films immersive tone. But with each new haunt the people who work at them become more and more bizarre until finally they are being pursued by the group with disastrous consequences. The last third of this film is so creepy and explores some very dark material. What sets "Houses" aside from the onslaught of found footage/mockumentary garbage is how believable everything comes across. Even though I've seen this a few times and done my research it's still hard for me to believe that it isn't real. Which makes it perfect for a terrorific Halloween viewing. Add to the fact that the film is drenched in the dark holiday. 

GORY GOODS: NIGHT OF THE DEMONS

1988 Horror 90 Mins. Cathy Podewell, Amelia Kinkade, Linnea Quigley, Billy Gallo Hal Harvins and Donnie Jeffcoat star.Written by Joe Augustyn Directed by Kevin Tenney Rated R for strong language, violence, gore sexuality and nudity

This has been a favorite of mind since my Dad took me to see it in the movies when I was 9 yrs. old. It's the first movie that got me into makeup. especially after learning that they made the demons teeth from Starburst. Although the makeup angle didn't stick it still stands as one of my favorite genre films. After years of scrutiny the horror community has finally found a place for "NOTD" and given the film it's justly due. The film centers on a group of friends who crash a Halloween party at a haunted funeral home with a tragic past and end up releasing a demonic plague of sorts taking them one by one. The film is filled with splendid awe inducing practical effects and maintains a retro 80's vibe with a fun, scary/funny mood. I'd be lying if I said there wasn't some unintentional funnies in here the opening scene with Judy at her house has become a cult gem for me and my friends. But if you haven't seen "NOTD" I highly recommend it. It's a fun example of the genre that doesn't take it too seriously and can be a lot of fun if you keep an open mind. It was followed by a more comical but decent sequel a horrifically bad third entry and an insipid remake. 

SLICE AND DICE: HELLBENT

2004 Horror/Thriller 84 Mins. Dylan Fergus Bryan Kirkwood, Hank Harris, Andrew Levitas and Hank Harris star. Written and Directed by Paul Etheredge Rated R for language violence gore sexuality, nudity and drug use.

From the producer of the original Halloween and The producer of the original Nightmare elm st. comes this super fun slasher flick. Set during the Halloween Carvinal in West Hollywood a group of gay friends finds themselves hunted by a hunky devil with an eight pack. The kill scenes are brutally fun in an 80's way and the film retains a fun, frenetic pacing throughout. The guys are sexy and the film even boasts a few scares and some rad chase scenes. Paul Etheredge approaches the proceedings with a sort of winking eye keeping it light and fun but the film doesn't skimp on the gory goods. The opening scene alone is worth a watch. The film is also a fun alternative for those who enjoy seeing guys run around scantily clad and screaming for their lives. 

SCARED SHITLESS: POSSESSION OF MICHAEL KING

2014 Horror/Thriller 83 Mins. Shane Johnson, Ella Anderson, Tomas Arana, Luke Baines and Cara Pifko star. Written and Directed by David Jung Rated R for language, violence, gore, sexuality and drug use

Can I just say that this movie is fucking scary! It's the type of film that just feels evil. That's partly due to the electrifying central performance from hunky Shane Johnson as Michael King. He  stars as a recently widowed single dad who is filming a sort of documentary to disprove the existence of god and the devil. He chooses to achieve this by visiting various people and having them do a bunch of creeptastic rituals on him. But along the way he manages to contact something real and opens himself up to it. All his research results in a truly disturbing possession, the likes of which have never been seen before. Now, everyone knows how many possession movies there are and besides a few, most of them suck. It makes it that much more impressive that in 2014 they finally have been able to reinvent the concept in a really frightening way. The film was unjustly ignored and this cinematic nightmare deserves it's due. But beware this is not a film for the faint of heart. This is an endurance test of absolute horror.

OUTRO:

Well farewell horror fans be safe. Remember to visit my blog and leave me some comments. Halloween is one day for most but it's everyday for me! Til next time enjoy the darkness!

NEW BLOOD: OUIJA ORIGIN OF EVIL

OUIJA ORIGIN OF EVIL
Universal
2016 Color
99 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
Annalise Basso, Elizabeth Reaser, Lulu Wilson,  Henry Thomas and Parker Mack star.
Written and Directed by Mike Flanagan
Rated PG-13 for language, violence and gore.

Who would have known that a sequel to Hasbro's guilty pleasure Ouija could spawn such an effective, original, inspired horror prequel. The movie takes place in 1967. Elizabeth Rease (Twilight) stars as Alice Zander a widowed mother who makes her money as a scam Medium. She ends up bringing an Ouija board home which is the new craze inspired by her daughter Lina played by the wonderful Annalise Basso (Oculus). Soon after her youngest daughter Doris begins communing with her dead father as well as spirits in the house which leads to disastrous results. Trust me you've never seen a possession like this, it's nightmarish. What separates "Origin" from the infinite horde of cinematic possession/Ouija garbage is Flannagan's classic execution. 

He takes the subject matter very seriously and gives the proceedings a much needed heft. The atmosphere throughout the film is thick with dread. When watching the trailers and seeing yet another creepy child I rolled my eyes, because they are just not just scary too me. Butt I take that back Lulu Wilson's Doris is horrific. She delivers her lines with a uncomfortable and disturbing zest. It all culminates with a shocking non mainstream ending that left me in awe. The rest of the cast offer solid performances as well. Reaser has never been better, she gives Alice layers uncommon in films like this. 

It's nice to see Henry Thomas on the big screen again, he's been missed and Parker Mack is handsome and delivers his lines with a flirty old school charm. As the movie progresses towards it's cringe worthy finale the scares gets more and more aggressive making for a truly memorable and nightmarish watch. 

Although not perfect I hoped for a bit more character development and the film can be a bit of a slow burn at times but "Origin" fares much better than Flanagan's Oculus which was a bit over hyped in my opinion.  Four movies have scared the crap out of me in my life. The Conjuring is still the scariest film I've ever seen, The original Insidious, Session 9 and this. This is without a doubt one of the scariest films I've ever seen. I'm not sure it will find a big audience in theaters because it's so dark, especially surprising considering it's PG-13 rating. But make no mistake this is one hell of a scary movie. ****.25/5

NEW BLOOD: BLAIR WITCH

BLAIR WITCH
Lionsgate
2016 Color
89 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
James Allen McCune, Corbin Reed, Brandon Scott, Wes Robinson and Valorie Curry star.
Written by Simon Barrett
Directed by Adam Wingard
Rated R for language, violence and gore.

I've been a long time fan of the small but inspired Blair Witch franchise from the beginning. I remember lining up for the original back in 1999 and than showing up for it's sequel in 2000. I enjoyed the first movie quite a bit and it only got better with each viewing. I found that movie to be so immersive and at the time it was unique in it's execution there was no other experience like it. As for the 2000 sequel I know a lot of you hated it but I sort of loved it. There was so much going on in the film below the surface it was truly an ingenious sequel to a tough movie to follow up. Now in 2016 we have Blair Witch the latest in a long line of generic reboots and sequels that studios keep punishing us with.

 At first the buzz was solid with the film heralding it as a new beginning for horror. And I have to give them props for that marketing twist. Releasing the first trailers as The Woods and than changing it's marketing over to Blair witch after a big comic con debut. But as the release grew closer other reviews started to drop and the movie went from a 100% positive to 43%. Not a great sign. So I went into the (empty) showing last night with low expectations. Well I can tell you that the new Blair Witch is an absolute joke. And that the film stands as a prime example of everything that's wrong in genre cinema today. The film follows Heather Donahue's supposed brother and his hapless friends as they film a documentary in search of her after some questionable footage was posted on you tube. You see, he was four when she disappeared and it apparently has overwhelmed him throughout his life with an ambition to go out and find her(yeah, okay).

 For the film's first half we are introduced to a group of one note characters played out dismally by a group of amateur actors. And once they hit the woods it follows in the steps of the original regurgitating almost every setup. But every time it moves even slightly beyond it's lame retread it recedes into a sordid cesspool of cheap jump scares and ridiculous directorial choices. When it does finally hit it's finale and we see glimpses of the supposed blair witch she looks like a stretched out, stick figure, alien who casts light spells which induced quite a bit of laughter. The main problem with this film is how it manages to be almost identical to the first film amping up the sort of cheesy scares they think the audience of today would like and offer far, far less.

There is really no story here and it's not remotely believable for a second. At least in the original the setup about the history and the inspired execution with all the interviews and such gave it an immersive heft. Here there are hardly any people in the film and not one of them is believable and neither is the hokey story the film makers threw together surrounding them. The new Blair Witch is a resemblance of everything that's wrong in modern genre cinema. We keep revisiting properties in an unnecessary way, More is never more and the retreads always have less of a purpose than their originals did. Some of them may offer minor amusement and there have been a handful of fun ones from the Chainsaw remake to Evil Dead and Dawn of the Dead but this sad retread is one note and offers absolutely nothing new. It's execution at this point after hundreds of Blair Witch rips offs feels forced and amateur and most definitely doesn't belong in theaters. I wish I could say I was really mad about the whole thing but in honesty The Blair Witch films stopped at 2 for me as this one is instantly forgettable. So if you're in the mood for some unintentional funnies go see this film if you're in the mood for something scary or just good avoid it all costs! *.5/5

IN DEFENSE OF BW2: BOOK OF SHADOWS

BLAIR WITCH 2: BOOK OF SHADOWS
Artisan/Haxan
2000 Color
90 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
Kim Director, Jeffrey Donovan, Erica Leerhseen, Stephen Barker Turner and Tristine Skylar star.
Written and Directed by Joe Berlinger
Rated R for language, violence, sexuality, nudity, drug use and gore.

Now I know many of you loathe this movie. But now that it's been 16 years since it's rushed release it's a good flick to revisit. Upon Blair Witch 2's release in the fall of 2000 the film was built up as the next chapter in a promising new horror franchise. From various magazine covers and a plethora of hype the film finally released on October 27, 2000 with a dud. The film opened with a less than stellar 13 million and ended it's run with just a little over 26 a far cry from the domestic 140 million plus take of the original. Budgeted at only 15 Million the film was still a slight success but it was the film that killed the franchise all together. I remember being so excited for this film to come out and going on opening night and like a mere 31% of the audience I wasn't disappointed.

 It's actually the first film that got me into writing. I was so peeved off by audience's reactions to the film I became very passionate about it all ,deconstructing what I saw and finding deeper meaning in many things. Now so many years later the film has built a small cult audience most of which that watch for the sheer silliness of it's execution. I, on the other hand still hold the film up as a slam dunk sequel and although I can now see the many missed opportunities throughout, the driving subtext through the film still intrigues me even to this day. Having recently revisited it last weekend to get ready for the new film releasing on Sept 16. I was once again enthralled by the on the surface simplistic story of a group of movie fans who go researching the nightmarish legend only to find themselves enwrapped in something far more sinister. Unlike the original this entry has more gore, some sex, nudity, drug use the expected staples of the genre but it's also just so much more.

 To really engulf your self in the proceedings you have to learn the history surrounding it and not just the made up bullshit. Writer/Director Joe Berlinger made his feature film debut with this movie known only by his Paradise Lost films. A series of award winning documentaries that shed light on the real life case of a group of gothic youngsters accused of killing a young child in their small town. The films were made to exonerate them showing the far more suspicious people surrounding the murder and how the accused were targeted because of the way they dressed and the music they liked. In a way it's almost depicted as a modern day witch hunt.

 So now we arrive at BW2 Book of Shadows. In the title alone Berlinger has stated the films undeniable attachment to those documentaries. There is no actual Book of Shadows in the film but that actually comes from a book that the accused possessed in Paradise Lost. The film is set on this group of obsessed movie fans who are blamed for gruesome murders of a nearby camp because of a seemingly suspicious thread of evidence highlighted by their obsession with the original film as well as the way they look and the beliefs they have. There is one point in the film where one of the actors all of which use their own names says " people think I'm a killer or something just because of the way I dress." None of the characters in the film feel real but work more as exaggerated stereotypes that are targeted because people don't understand them and that leads to a fear of the unknown.

 As the film moves along it manages to be a so so horror sequel that fleshes out the originals concept a bit more but does so in a way that it comes off a bit comical. But underneath it all the film is asking the audience to question their beliefs on the whole hysteria as well as obsession, the media's twisting of the truth, mental illness and prejudice amongst many other things. In the film's climax we see one thing while it happens and later learn it has appeared differently on film which one character highlights earlier on saying that "film lies but video tells the truth". There are so many layers to this film and it's ambition for better or worse is what makes it so brilliant in my humble opinion.  the performances from Donovan and Director are memorable and inspired and both have gone on to do a lot more with the careers.

 the rest of the performances range from mediocre to unintentionally funny in spots. And yes there are scenes that just don't translate well and come off hokey as hell, as well as some questionable dialogue. However,  In conclusion all of these things make Blair Witch 2 so much more than what people originally saw it as. A cheap cash in on a big property. The film isn't perfect by any means but instead of following the original films formula it dared to be different and wasn't rewarded for it but as we all know mainstream audiences tend to want the same thing over and over again which is obvious  with the endless parade of unnecessary sequels, remakes and reboots. This film however stands apart as a true work of art worth further examination. for extra fun watch the documentary on the DVD the secrets of Esrever and look for clues hidden throughout the film. ****.75/5