SO BAD IT'S GOOD: VALENTINE

VALENTINE
Warner Bros.
2001 Color
96 Mins.
Horror/Thriller
Denise Richards, Marley Shelton, David Boreanaz, Jessica Capshaw, Jessica Caufield, Katherine Heigl, Fulvio Cecere, Daniel Cosgrove and Adam Harrington star.
Written by Donna Powers
Directed by Jamie Blanks
Rated R for language, violence, gore and sexuality

Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. They're gonna need dental records to identify you. Lots of fun rhymes populate this terrible wannabe slasher franchise that offers up the goofy so bad it's good cheap thrills in spades. The film tells that generic story of a young boy bullied at a Valentine dance. And than returns later as an adult to wreak havoc on those who have wronged him. The setup is basic  and executed much better in everything from Terror Train to Prom Night but when you meet those shallow bitches as adults is when the funnies really begin. From the forced, over sexualized performances to the unnecessarily gruesome V Day horrors the film overstays it's welcome by maybe 30 mins but offers a lot of entertainment along the way. In it's defense you can tell that no one associated with the production is taking it too seriously and that fun attitude shows through it's run time.Also the production value for a film of this type is rather impressive. But a bad movie is still a bad and a fun bad movie is always welcome. Valentine is just that a movie that wants to be scary but is generically executed to be anything but an "up all night" feature. Featuring a disastrously delicious turn from Denise Richards, her hot tub scene is everything! ***/5